Re-craping 6x13 Things a Mama Don't Know

Peyton: (on phone): Lucas? I'm pregnant. Yes, I am with spawn. That's for proposing over the phone.
Lucas: I'm happy.

Haley: Was that Deb on the phone? I'm starting to get worried since we haven't seen her for a few weeks.
Nathan: No, that was about my "comeback". I'm on a team! That slamball storyline and conversations with dead Q were so worth it.

Mouth: Millie left me.
Skills: She'll be fine.
Millie: *sobbing*
Owen: *drinks*

Brooke: I've been looking for Sam all night! Will you help me?
Police Officer: Have you been drinking? That's what we usually ask people when they say their kids have disappeared.

Julian: The studio director slash my bastard father wants to meet you.
Lucas: I should get back to my pregnant fiance but eh. I'll go.

Mia: Peyton, I'm sorry you were a bitch to me.
Peyton: You're forgiven.

Nathan: So this is my comeback.
Mean Teammate: I'm number 23 now. I don't want you on my team. Blah blah trashtalk.
Nathan: This feels strangely familiar.

Andre: I wish I could talk to Quentin.
Jamie: "My mama says sometimes you have to cry out all your tears to make way for a heartful of smiles."
Andre: *heaves*

Skills: I'm now an MM cheerleader as well as an LP one. I'll take the screentime where I can get it.
Millie: I'll talk to Mouth.

Julian's father: My son is a disappointment to me. I don't blame you for hating him.
Lucas: Did you shoot your own brother too?
Julian's father: What? No.

Haley: *looking for screentime* Oh, Mia. Can I hang out with you?
Mia: Okay, but only until my epiclovestory with Chase begins.

Chase: Peyton called me. She told me you were drinking again.
Owen: I work in a bar, dude. What did you expect?

X: *is creepy*
(Jack and Sam try to escape)
Sam: Jack! Help me!
Jack: *runs like a bitch*

Peyton: Julian, stop stalking me.
Julian: Not everything is about you. Any word on Sam?
Brooke: The boy that was in Sam's bed! Maybe he might know something!
Julian: I'll look for him.
Peyton: We'll ask Haley for his address. Off screen, obviously.

Mouth: Millie, I'm so sorry. I love you.
Millie: I'm not an unicorn anymore.
Mouth: You whore! Get out.

Brooke: I can't believe I let Sam go missing.
Haley: How do you keep track of someone? I have no idea where Jamie is right now, and Deb hasn't been seen for weeks.
Brooke: You probably aren't the right people to help me. I'd better go alone.
Peyton: I plan to lock my first born up, or at least not let him wander around cemeteries.
Haley: You're pregnant! Can I be godmother?
Peyton: Thanks for unleashing those arguments.

Brooke: Have you seen my foster daughter?
X: *is creepy* Have a nice night.
Brooke: It's the middle of the day. Wait...you attacked me! *pepper spray* Sam! Sam!
Sam: Brooke, run! He's really creepy!
(Brooke pulls out gun)
Continuity Fairy: Where did you get that? I thought you left your gun at Victoria's.
Contrivance Fairy: Quiet, you.
Brooke: I kill you with my overacting!
Sam: "Please don't. I need you Mom."
Brooke: Okay, I'll just pistol-whip him.
Julian and Jack: Um...us to the rescue?

(Hours later)
Police: Hey look, Quentin Field's wallet. What can this possibly mean?
Brooke: Oh my God! He killed Quentin! The bastard!
Julian: There, there.

Lucas: Hey Peyton. Hey, Spawn.
Peyton: Hey, Spawn. Daddy's home.
Viewers: God help us all.