Re-craping 6x09 Sympathy for the Devil

Previously on One Tree Hill: Lived In Inch and cecilia jane got way behind with the re-craps.

Sam: Have you forgiven me for ruining Peyton's wedding dress?
Brooke: No. You're still grounded.
Owen: I brought flowers.
Brooke: You still suck for abandoning me. Try diamonds next time.

Haley: Here you go honey, Michael Phelp's breakfast.
Nathan: "Haley, 90,000 calories a day is not going to keep me from getting hit on the Slamball court."
Haley: "No but it will give you a little extra padding when you do."
Nathan: I thought you liked my hot body.

Lucas: "So what was your first impression of Julian?"
Peyton: *flashback*
Julian: Why are you crying?
Peyton: Get used to it.

Julian: I love your script, but you need to show Dan killing Keith.
Lucas: But I don't know what happened. Oh well, I'll just squint and brood for an episode.

Nathan: I can't believe I'm playing with trampolines and that loser Mouth is on TV.
Mouth (on TV): And the slamball storyline continues. Also Gigi continues to throw herself at me, for some reason.

Brooke: I don't like Owen, but I like him bringing me loot.
Peyton: That's not fair to him.
Brooke: Really? I'm getting relationship advice from you?
Peyton: *flashback*
Julian: "If it isn't the saddest girl in the world."
Peyton: "Maybe they're tears of joy."
Julian: Go out with me.
Peyton: No. Yes. Okay.

Lucas: What's your best memory of Dan?
Nathan: Blah blah basketball.

Owen: You think you're the only one who can pull off the naked in the back seat stunt.
Brooke: You're a huge hairy guy on my leather seats. Get out!
Naked Owen: At least she said I was huge.
*sirens*
Naked Owen: Great, a town full of psychos and the cops show up when I get naked.

Haley: Sam, will you watch Jamie? Try not to take him to any wild parties this time.
Sam: Jamie, here's how to take people's money.

Haley: Lucas, why are you standing in the hallway where Keith was killed?
Lucas: I'm thinking about how I hate Dan. I think I'll destroy his grave. The cops only show up in Tree Hill when Owen's naked.

*flashback*
Julian: I love you.
Peyton: I love you too. Let's move in together! Have you got a baby we can kidnap?

Jamie: Grandpa Dan, Sam's teaching me how to steal.
Dan: Do you have a Book of Nefarious Plans?

*flashback*
Julian: Peyton, why do you have 12,000 copies of Lucas's book?
Peyton: You don't understand. It's all about meeeee!
Julian: I'm done.

Peyton: Is this movie part of a plan to get me back?
Julian: Get over yourself, girlfriend. Remember who dumped who here.

Brooke: I'm sorry you got arrested.
Owen: I'm not bringing you loot anymore.

*Slamball game commences*
Sam: I'm sorry for teaching Jamie to steal.
Haley: You should try to be a role model to him.
Sam: Whatever. I'm 15.
*Nathan gets pushed through glass*
Jamie: "Don't play Slamball anymore, daddy."
Nathan: You think!?

Lucas: Why did you kill Keith?
Dan: Because every story needs a villain. And Schwanny needed the ratings.
Lucas: How anti-climatic.

Brooke: I'm in the backseat of Owen's car again, only this time I'm fully clothed.
Owen: I preferred the nudity.
Brooke: You're a great guy, but I need to find myself. Or find someone better than you.
Owen: So, what's on top of the clothes, Brooke Davis?

Lucas: I saw a picture of you at Julian's. Do you know each other or something?
Peyton: "We were in love."
Lucas: This is so not making it into the sequel.

Re-craping 6x14 A Hand to Take Hold of the Scene

Seyton: I’m with Spawn! You hear me? I’m with Spawn!
Lucas: I know you already said it six times. I am contemplating suicide.
Peyton: How am I gonna tell Brooke?

Brooke: I’ve got a date with Julian. But it’s not a date. It’s a business meeting.
Sam: Yes, it is. And Julian is fiiine.
Peyton: I’m with Spawn!
Brooke: Is that your only line?
Peyton: I'm with Spawn!
Brooke: Get out! Sorry, that was just for the promo monkeys. Gimme a hug.

Haley: Hey, you finally showed up. Mia wanted us to prop up her date with Chase.
Nathan: So now, we’re props to second rate characters? Where’s the Sunkist?

Peyton: I hear you're going on a date with Brooke. You break her heart, I'll break your face.
Sam: Don't mind her, she's with spawn.
Julian: *sad*

Brooke: Hey Millie. Girl code girl code girl code!
Millie: I slept with Owen.
Brooke: GET OUT! Just kidding, gimme a hug.

Haley: Hi. I hear I'm going to be an auntie.
Lucas: Peyton told you she was with spawn?
Haley: No, you just did! Congratulations! By the way, you're babysitting Jamie and his annoying friend.
Lucas: You suck.

Mouth: Owen sucks. Throw darts at him.
Viewers: Way ahead of you.
Brooke: You can't be mad at Millie for cheating on you. You kept porno pictures of Gigi on your phone. Gimme a dart.

Jamie and Andre: *high on Sunkist*
Peyton: (high on Sunkist) We have lots of games for yooooooouuuuu!
Lucas: Seriously, I am contemplating suicide.

Chase: Where's Mia?
Haley: Here she comes in slow motion.
MastermindDirectorChad: I was bored and playing with the buttons, okay?
Chase: Nathan, please let me beat you at this basketball game so Mia will like me.
Nathan: Seriously, where's the Sunkist?

Brooke: Can't have wine for my date with Julian. Wine says do me.
Julian: I brought wine.
Brooke: Perfect.

Sam: I'm here for you, Jack.
Jack: I know. That's why I'm depressed.

Montage:
*Nathan and Chase rap*
*Jamie and Andre rap*
*Viewer suicide rates go up over night*

Millie: I'm drunk. Seduce me Mouth.
Mouth: Um, no. You need to leave now.

Haley: Our propping for the night is over, let's leave Mia and Chase alone.
Mia: Alone at last.
Chase: Too bad no one cares.

Peyton: Kids are exhausting. We're going to be terrible parents.
Lucas: It's okay. I got walky-talkies!
Peyton: "My baby thinks of everything!"
Lucas: Lay off the Sunkist, alright?

Brooke: It would be a very bad idea to mix business with pleasure.
Julian: Yes, it would.
Brooke: Wanna make out?
Julian: Okay.

Nathan: (on walky-talky) Lucas? We kidnapped Jamie and Andre back while you guys were asleep. I also stole one of your walky-talkies.
Lucas: It's just like having a real brother.
Nathan: I hear Peyton is with spawn. Speaking of spawn, shut up Jamie.
Jamie: Roger that.